Another Week has gone by

Its been a week since Ed flew back to California. I've had another lonely weekend, but the world didn't stop spinning. I even have clean clothes for work tomorrow, fresh food in the fridge, made it to my dentist appointment, made it to my hair appointment. The cats are fed, the litter changed. I have even run the sweeper twice this week.



I went hiking alone yesterday at Black Hill Regional Park, that was really nice. I really enjoyed it. Today the weather wasn't quite as nice, it was spritzing rain. I had intended to was the car, but that wasn't meant to be.
I went to the movies alone, to see the new Michelle Pfeiffer movie, Cheri. Michelle was good, but I really didn't like the movie much. Some woman saw a mouse in the theatre, but I'm not too worried about mice, so I just stayed in my seat.
All in all, I'm doing pretty good. I hate eating all my meals alone, but that can be viewed as a benefit. I have less clean up after I prepare a meal. I can eat oatmeal for dinner if I want. Or, I can go out and order something outrageous and use Ed's debit card...LOL.
I got weighed in on Wednesday, because I missed my Monday weigh in. I have gained 1.8 lbs. So I'm a bit concerned about that, but I'll just keep on trying.
After the hiking on Saturday, my foot was hurting some...so I think I'll have to be more careful.

I am looking forward to Thursday. Jet Blue will carry me from Dulles to San Francisco for a long weekend with my husband. That will be nice and I am really anticipating it.

Have a Happy 4th wherever you are, my loved ones.

Thank you for the Birthday Greetings!

My Birthday was so fun yesterday! Thanks to many many of you that sent me cute and funny greetings in honor of the occasion!

I really appreciate it!

Poor Ed, he didn't have much luck helping me celebrate. I knew he wanted to take me out somewhere really nice for dinner and I was really looking forward to that. He wouldn't tell me where he was taking me, only that it was somewhere I had never eaten before. (Later, I would realize that he didn't tell me the name of the restaurant because he simply could not remember the name of the restaurant.) He could remember the location though.
So, I finished my conference early in downtown DC, not too far from his office. I tried to reach him via his cell phone for a couple hours, but NO CAN DO.
Guess he cannot hear his cell phone.
I text messeged him...but he apparantly could not detect any message that way either.

So, I went home to Bethesda alone and waited for dinner.

Of course, he jumped right on the Metro and rushed home, knowing this was a special occassion.....well maybe not.
After no communications with me all day - no returned calls, no texts, etc. I finally heard him coming in the door at about a quarter till 7.

No need pointing out at this point I was pissed, starving, and in general not a happy camper.

Sooooo.... it seems he fell asleep on the Metro and went clear to Shady Grove, the end of the line. (Where the conductor apparently made him get off the train.) [on a personal note, I don't think I would have even told anyone I did that.]

So much for rushing home...

So, grumpily and very hungry, I went to the mystery place for dinner. He still couldn't remember the name of the restaurant [aricept] so I just went along. We parked in downtown Rockville and walked down the street. Finally, he stopped and pointed to an empty storefront. "Well, we were going to eat there."

I looked at the vacant storefront. I know there was once a pretty nice restaurant there, but it definitely appeared to be long gone.

He tried to steer me toward yet another in a long line of Thai food places. I just don't love Thai food.
So, I turned him around and we ate at a modest little Mexican place. It was OK. By this time I was beyond hunger and needed protein, sugar and fat in any form. So, Hey, it filled the bill.

I want a Birthday Dinner Do Over.

How 'bout The Inn at Little Washington?

Surprise wedding dance

I hope you take time to watch this one, it is so cute. Really gave me a much needed laugh, Thanks Pam!!

Surprise wedding dance

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I was sitting here in my windowless office wondering how to remember to be grateful and how to rid myself of my foul mood. (Its pouring rain here and thunder and lightening on my morning swim to Metro.) I mean really, I was looking for the animals in pairs boarding the ark.
Well, this did it! Black mood banished, wish I had been at that wedding, how fun!

It must be Monday

Today was weigh in day -- following a weekend in WV. It was tough to eat healthy in WV. I actually had a hoagie from Philips. And french fries at the Clique Club...ah well.

I actually lost -.8 lbs.!!!!!!

This is significant because it brings me to a new milestone of over 65 lbs. Officially 65.6 lbs. lost since last June, one year ago. I've really losing very very slowly now, but that's OK.

Ed reports that he took a pretty bad fall on Saturday. He was bringing in a new desk for our condo in California, he lost his balance and fell like a somersault down a whole flight of stairs up to our 2nd floor condo. He is just bruised, but seems OK. Nothing broken.

Concert in the Park ~ Lovely summer evenings

Tonight after work I went to Brookside Gardens for the first of their free Summer Evening Concerts. It was really a lovely evening here, the storms just missed us tonight.
The concert was lively and fun, sort of a local Rock A Billy type group. An upright guitar, two normal guitars and percussion. It was awesome, kids ran around, old people danced, it was fun.

I even got a compliment on Mom's car. I heard a guy say, "wow, nice car. Hey, I like your car."
So, I turned to see who said that, and it was a nice young man with Down's syndrome. He was getting into a shared van with someone in a wheelchair. I smiled and thanked him for the compliment. He smiled and said "I'd like to have a car like that someday."

Hmm...I would too! Sort of puts things in perspective, doesn't it.

Suddenly Single, or not?

Today is Weigh-In Monday! It has been three weeks since my group met, our leader was on vacation and I was in Hawaii at the meeting for a nice chunk of that time. After so much time of being out of my element, off my routine, stressed out, I figured I would be in for a shock on the scale.
But good news! I have stayed exactly the same. That is very very good indeed. This means I may actually have a chance of sustaining my weight loss long term!!! I have lost 64.8 lbs. since last June. It will be a year this month!
My doctor visit last week was also good news, I am in the normal range on all my blood work, without any meds. So, the message is PERSEVERE!
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On the home front, I have gone to the Kennedy Center for a fun National Symphony Orchestra Pops concert featuring the Temptations! It was great.
Amazing to hear this symphonic orchestra play Beach Boys and Temptations. The Temptations themselves are wonderful and very energetic. One original band member remains, after 48 years he is still doing this! They were cool.

I had to go alone, as Ed is living in CA and I'm here. That part I do not like. I eat nearly all my meals completely alone and spend any time outside of work completely alone.

I am having a problem with this. I left home at 19 to marry Ed, I have never lived alone. I never wanted to live alone. So...
Sometimes I think this could be a good thing. A learning experience.
But, as I feel so lonely, I don't see how this is a good thing. I'm trying to remain positive, but this hurts, feels bad, and I hate it. This is painful.

This is not as if I have been suddenly widowed or divorced - there are actually support groups for that, and your girlfriends rally around you. I think that must be more devastating, but different. I have read that when someone you love dies, sometimes you may feel anger at them for leaving you. I can understand that.

My life here in Maryland has centered around frequent trips to WV taking up my weekends, activities with Ed taking up the other open time. I have no network to support me now. What am I supposed to do, take up dating? My single friends have networks/significant others/family.....I don't quite fit with all the singles, I am not single (or am I?) I don't fit with the marrieds now, I don't have a partner.

Ed, on the other hand, is back with our old group of ready made friends in California. He is doing outings on Bob's boat, dinners at Thai restaurants. Friends, companions, good times.

Am I consigned to an existence, where I can go to concerts (but alone) I can go out to eat always at a table for one. I go to work and come home to an empty condo, which I never loved to begin with. I am seeing a problem here. I think I am the only one who sees it though. Bummer.

Good thing the Snodgrass women are strong, independent and resilient. I guess.

I think this sucks.